The Host Family Experience: What Was I Thinking?!
Zachary M. Jones
What were you thinking, Zach?! I ask myself as I wait on the street corner to be (basically) adopted by a French family. It would have been so easy to just stay in the dorms with your own privacy, perfectly-working wifi, and everything right there for you! Why did you think you had to be so bold and adventurous and stay in some strangers’ home?!
At this very moment, aside from questioning what in the world I was thinking when I signed up for this, I’m sweating down my neck and back with my backpack on and huge suitcase by my side, looking around for any sign of them. Cars zoom by left and right, and I wonder if they've already hauled right past me. What car am I even supposed to be looking for?
I think to myself: Zach, I can’t imagine what you look like right now. The only thing missing to make you look even more out of place at this point is a Nike baseball cap and white sneakers! The Montpellier sun is beating down on the Earth, and there is the faintest salty sea breeze from the Mediterranean. Deep breaths, Zach. Just breathe, I tell myself, having hopes that this lame zen technique will work. My heart is beating through my chest and I can hear each pump of pure adrenaline run from my toes, up my spine, and out my ears. I am minutes away from finally meeting ma famille française. I’m physically shaking and emotionally numb, yet feeling every emotion run through my body: fear, excitement, uncertainty, stress, ...but most of all, anticipation. Anticipation for the adventure ahead of me. Les aventures chez ma famille française.
A chugging little Peugeot comes whipping around the traffic circle, and something inside of me knows instantly that this is them. I just feel it. All of these feelings instantly subside as I am surrounded. Bisous are given left and right, all of my luggage is taken out of my hands. Before I know it, I’m part their family -fully accepted as their American son.
Fast forward four months, and I’m at our kitchen table holding back tears as we enjoy our last meal together. I’m showered in small gifts and praised for how much my French has improved. I’m thinking, irrationally of course, of what I can possibly do tomorrow morning to miss my flight back to the States and stay here with them forever. I think of all the amazing people I’ve met along the way, and what job I can land tomorrow that will allow me to stay here forever.
What I initially thought was extremely true. It would have been so easy to just stay in the dorms with my own privacy, perfectly working wifi, and everything right there for me. But that wouldn’t have changed me as a person. I wouldn’t have been forced to try hundreds of kinds of French cheese, learned the inside scoop of the upcoming French election, or try blood sausage in fear of seeming rude or ungrateful. I wouldn’t have learned half of the swear words that the French use when driving, or have had to look up how to say, “Umm...I think I might have clogged the toilet upstairs”. I wouldn’t have had a French brother to watch le football with at the bars, learned the traditions of a French Christmas, traditional French gender relations, or made connections in my French city that will last a lifetime.
If you go abroad, please take my advice: Go all the way. If the opportunity is available to you, live with une famille and learn the culture from the inside out -literally. I’m sure you’ll ask yourself What was I thinking?!, but I promise you that you won’t be the same person that you are today. Profitez-en !
“A ship in a harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for”
